Meta-Blogging

i'm not a big fan of meta-blogging (blogging about blogging), but i'm going to do it anyways. i'll try to get it all out of my system this once, so hopefully it won't happen again. You've been warned.

i am, as you may be aware, a competitive person. In the last few years, this has tapered off a bit, but it is really more of a shift of focus than a slacking of my competitive nature. i find that now i want to do my best at anything i happen to turn to, and winning a game or beating someone else isn't as important as it used to be. It's actually more subtle than it might seem. Let's say i'm playing a game of chess with you, and we're approximately evenly matched. My satisfaction with the result would be descending as follows:

1. I win a hard-fought game where neither of us made any obvious errors
2. You win a hard-fought game where neither of us made any obvious errors
3. I win where you (and I) made some errors
4. You win where I made some errors
5. The game is a comedy of errors (we both lose, in my opinion)

Yes, i prefer winning to losing. But i would prefer losing but having played well than winning in spite of errors. Not only that, but i find myself making recommendations to others as to their best option in a given situation (particularly in a new strategy game (think Puerto Rico) we're all learning), even if it means minimizing my own chances to win. i'm not a big fan of the 'hope he doesn't see this' strategy, but i do appreciate the misdirection strategy (the main difference being in the intent and skill of the player). (By the way, i still do occasionally get grumpy just because i lost, but it is less frequent than it used to be)

Now what does this have to do with blogging? i'm also competitive when pursuing personal endeavors. i don't want to take bad pictures, so i've been reading about how to take better photos. i would rather be able to consistently make good food than accidentally make great food. This can also get me into trouble, because i shy away from trying new things, for fear of failure/looking bad. So, since i am blogging, i want to produce a quality product. i also want to have as many readers as possible, but because they actually appreciate my content and not just because they happen to know me.

How do i produce a quality product? In particular, what should i write about? i don't just want to write about the latest thing that happened to me, because that will most likely even bore (particularly?) me. i'm just not that good of a writer (yet). Besides, i'm already writing about Gavin elsewhere, and he is orders of magnitude more interesting than i. So, should i have a theme? Should i bounce around all over the place (from responses i have to things i've read, to comics i like (warning - some offensive content), to trying to explain why i am the way i am, to...)? My guess is that it will be pretty unstructured, but it might be nice to have a seed for ideas as well. Any suggestions?

My desire to have as many readers as possible stems more from that same drive to achieve than anything else. Plus, i really like when the countries and states on my Google Analytics site turn green (indicating hits from that place). Visual consumption of data is fun! As of this writing, i have hits from five states, and two of them have only provided one hit. In contrast, Gavin's site has visits from four countries (US, Canada, England and Mexico(‽)), including 12 different states (5 with a single hit). That doesn't bother me, since it's kind of silly to compete with myself (especially because there's no way i could compete with Gavin), but i do have an (irrational) desire to rack up the hits. Right now, most of my family and friends don't even know about the blog (i don't want to advertise a lackluster product, and i wanted to make sure i would actually keep posting). So i'm sure i could improve my stats quite easily by just letting people know. Maybe i'll start there. But i'm aiming higher (and i won't be disappointed if i miss, i promise).

Your comments and suggestions are most welcome.